Monday, April 23, 2012

A Day Funny Enough for a Sitcom

Many of you out there may just love flying around the country or overseas and for some of you, it doesn't bother you one little bit.  I could only wish that this were a description of me. I've tried for years to conquer my fear of flying, but this is just one fear that I can't seem to shake, no matter how many Bible verses I quote while I am waiting for take-off, or while in the air when turbulence decides to play a little joke on me.  You would think for as many times I've flown within the U.S. and to countries around the world that this just wouldn't be an issue, but it still is- and a BIG one at that!  Yesterday began with my co-worker and I getting up at 4:30 am in Denver, to prepare for our "exciting" flight back to D.C.  Now I will say, the only thing better than flying with someone who loves flying is flying with someone who hates flying just as much as you do, it's a great support system as you can only imagine. This was my story yesterday.

As we dropped off our rental car and approached the airport, that sickening feeling began in the pit of our stomachs and if only people could have seen us, I think our day at the airport might have been funny enough to be written as an episode of "Friends".  Between two crazy females that hated flying to what would happen when we arrived in DC, it would have made for some funny entertainment on your living room coach.

Let me begin this story by saying that our airplane both going and coming had the strangest noise we had ever heard both right before taking off and right after landing, which is not what a nervous flying duo wants to hear right before take off. (of course we would later find out that several people had freaked out asked about it only to find out it was some sort of hydraulic system on the plane of this particular airline) Our flight yesterday was actually very smooth as far as flights go, and I only think we only had 1-2 moments where we had to squeeze the seats until our knuckles turned white or apply pressure points to relieve fear, which we had actually learned about during our conference.

It was what would happen when we landed that would make for a funny sitcom. We landed at Reagan International in DC, and after waiting forever for our suitcases (patiently of course) we headed off to the parking garage to get our car. Let me insert here that we forgot which level we parked on, but at least remembered the garage letter, so did finally find the car. When we hit the unlock button nothing happened. Within a few minutes we realized that the car battery was dead as we had left a light on- of course neither of us remember having a light on, but of course at this point- we were just tired and wanted to get home.  Now we just had to figure out how to find someone to come jump the car. 

After asking someone close by if they could jump our car, and realizing this wasn't going anywhere- we saw an "emergency post" with a big red sign that said "Press For Help". However, everything on it looked like it was for a fire or some large scale emergency so we hesitated to push the red button. (not sure about you, but pressing red buttons is usually not a good thing, so we opted not to at this point in the story) 


We decided to go back into the airport only to find someone who actually sent us on a wild goose-chase (or rather police-chase actually- as that was who this staff person said we needed to find). 

We went where we were told and were both running up and down an area outside  (let me insert here that it was pouring rain and very cold outside- and we were both running on about 4-5 hours of sleep- not a pretty combination) where the police were supposed to be found for an emergency. (good thing there wasn't a unabomber around today)

After searching outside and on several floors for about a 1/2 hour, we went down one last time to one of the baggage areas and came across an airport staff lady who was quite hurried and when my co-worker tried to stop her to ask if she could help, we sort of got that " I really don't have time for you" attitude as she kept walking hurriedly away half acknowleding us. It was at this moment we realized why she didn't care about her job at that particular moment, as we hadn't noticed who was standing right beside us. We looked up and realized that Jesse Jackson was standing right beside us and everyone was snapping photos and taking video with their phones. (apparently he had been speaking at the Earth Day 2012 rally in Washington, I later found out) Neither of us had a desire to snap a photo , but you would have thought it was a movie star in the airport the way all of people were trying to get a photo. Don't get me wrong, had it been someone else I probably would have sneaked a quick photo.

At this point, we decided no one seemed to know anything in the airport, so we headed back to the parking garage to come up with "Plan B". By this point I'm sure you have already guessed where this is going-- yep, the RED BUTTON.  We had no other choice, so regardless of the consequences, we decided to push the red button and brace ourselves for the outcome. The light on top of the column began flashing, but to our surprise, a lady's voice came through the box and asked what our emergency was. We chuckled, told her, and within 5 minutes a man showed up to jump our car. No firetrucks, ambulances, or alarms- just a sweet little man in an airport truck who had us on our way in about 2 minutes.

Lesson of the Day- when given an option, always push the RED button.

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Empowered to Connect Conference- Denver

For the last 3 days, I have been in Denver, Colorado for the Empowered to Connect Conference 




which is an amazing 2 day conference discussing the dynamics of children who come from hard places. It is a conference that every adoption worker, foster care worker, or foster/adoptive parent should attend. I could not recommend it more!  This conference is sponsored by Show Hope, which was founded by Steven Curtis and Mary Beth Chapman, following the adoption of their first daughter from China.


This organization has a passion to share the vision or orphan care and adoption and is a wonderful ministry that has given thousands of families adoption grants in order to make adoption more affordable to Christian families. What they have created for orphans and families both the U.S. and around the world is remarkable. I could talk about their ministry for far longer than this post will allow, so we'll save more for later.

Today, we were in day two of the conference and though I have had years in adoption work and sat through numerous trainings for my job, this conference opened my eyes in new ways to what children who have been in foster care or who have been adopted domestically or internationally may have faced or may still face ever after they are home. Though some of the principles discussed were not new concepts, they were expounded on  in new ways and many new concepts were taught this week in such a tangible and practical way.  Dr. Karen Purvis, Director of the Institute of Child Development at Texas Christian University, has written so much on this topic and has spent the last decade developing research-based interventions for adopted, foster and other at-risk children. She provided wonderful insight into numerous topics, provided practical application, and reminded everyone that no matter what you may face- there is always hope, don't give up on a child.


I will certainly expound more on this conference, but if I can say anything at all, I would encourage families to check out her book "The Connected Child" as well as numerous resources that are available on her website. It will be time and money VERY well spent in learning strategies and successful ways to help  your foster child, adopted child, or other at-risk children.  You can look out for more on this topic and conference in the upcoming days-- it's just far too late here in Denver with an early 4:30am wake up call to type more on this subject tonight.

After the conference was over, my co-worker and I took a short drive to see the agency that Nate and I were adopting through. Obviously, I couldn't be this close without seeing where it was. (if you recall, Nate and I couldn't adopt through the agency where I work, due to state laws as well as conflict of interest, so we had to chose another agency to work with) It was somewhat surreal to be here in Denver this week as the last time Nate and I were here in July of 2011, we began praying intensely about considering adoption.  In the end it is truly a God-thing that we ended up going with an agency based in the same area.


Since we had some down time this evening, we headed to the Red Rocks Park and Amphitheater around sunset which was absolutely beautiful tonight.


This is the largest outdoor concert venue in the U.S. and is absolutely breathtaking to look at. As we climbed the stairs of the venue, I was reminded how out of shape I apparently am how much the altitude in Denver affects your oxygen levels when you do anything to exert a little energy as well as how thirsty the altitude makes you.




It was a great ending to a few days here and, as always, Colorado doesn't disappoint when it comes to beautiful scenery, friendly people, and incredible sunsets.




I am truly thankful for the opportunity to come to this conference. I look forward to being able to share with others all of the valuable information and resources I took from this conference, not only as an adoption worker, but as a soon to be adoptive parent.

Monday, April 16, 2012

It's Official- we are LID!


Today started off like any other day, and truthfully, I did not expect to see any exciting emails in my inbox, so what I received later today was a complete surprise. Here is how our day today unfolded- work certainly can be a little crazy some days, but today might have been one of the craziest days I can think of in a while. When you work in the field of international adoption, nothing surprises you and today was just one of those days when everything possible that had to be done or could possibly come up, came up- including tonight is China's referral matching night. Now, all of this to say-- after a very long and crazy work day, and knowing I had to work some tonight as well, I took a short break and went to prepare dinner for Nate and me when all I really wanted to do was kick back and relax for the evening.

It was at this point, while preparing dinner, that I decided to finally check my personal email and Nate received a call from work. Of course it would be at this very moment I see an email in my inbox that says "You are LID" to which I let out a squeal calmly waited for Nate to get off of the phone...not of course before doing a little jump and happy dance (reminiscent of my cheerleading days- but with no vocals, since Nate was still on the phone with our pastor). I know he thought I was crazy.  FINALLY he got off of the phone and asked "What in the world?" to which I kindly explained what very important email we had just received and what exactly it meant.

(this is where I brag on him a little because he actually understands quite a bit about this process-- he's had years to hear me talk about these processes through my work and now after diving into this on a personal level in the last few months, he's probably learned more than he actually wanted to ) The exciting thing that I reminded him was that our dossier arrived at the CCCWA in China on Good Friday, April 6th which was 6 business days ago, and here we are today being notified of our LID. I was quite impressed at the quick LID, I must say. It can sometimes take up to 3 weeks for it to be logged in at the Center.

When I shared with my Chinese friend about our LID she said, "You do know that the number 16 is a lucky number in China" to which I grinned and let out a little laugh. (if there is one thing to know about China or the Chinese people- they have a culture full of tradition and superstition)

Ironically, we were already having Asian food for dinner, so after dinner I decided to take our chopsticks and celebrate the occasion of today with the following photo:
I also had a few fortune cookies around from some dinner we had before, and decided to take one and open it just for fun to see what the message was inside. It read, "Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood".

I find this fun little message to be fitting for the adoption process, as for many, this process can certainly cause fear/anxiety over what is to come-- thoughts such as "What will our child be like?" "What type of medical condition will our child have?" "What will her story be?" "How is she doing right now- whether in her mother's womb or in the orphanage or foster home where she may be living?" 

All of these thoughts can cause fear unless we choose to put all our anxiety on Him, knowing that He cares, understands, and is in control.

Even though we most likely have many months still before we are matched, our LID (log in date) is an important date from which the rest of our process will be based. Our desire would be that hopefully we will find out that China has reviewed our dossier (which is based on the LID) before we get matched. If it is reviewed before matching, we won't have to wait as long until we travel; however, if we are matched by our agency before China reviews our dossier (which can take a number of months before it will ever be reviewed) then we will have a longer wait until travel (personally- we don't want that cute little referral picture on the fridge for many months knowing that we can't travel). China reviews dossiers each month and it can take months to get through several months of dossiers. Currently China is reviewing dossiers that were LID from October 2011 and forward, so there are still 6 months of dossiers from October 2011 LID's and beyond that haven't yet been reviewed and will be reviewed before they reach our month of April 2012. This is why we wanted to get our dossier in so quickly, so it can basically "sit in line" waiting for our LID to come up for review. =)

So, as this exciting day comes to a close, we are thankful that this important step in our process is now complete and we can sit back thankful to God for a quick LID, that only He could have orchestrated.

Saturday, April 7, 2012

Easter at the Ronald McDonald House

It's Easter weekend, and this morning we started our day at around 5:30 a.m. as we met our Community Group from our church for a service project downtown at the Ronald McDonald House.  We decided several weeks ago that as a group, we would bring, cook, and serve breakfast Easter weekend to the families staying at the Ronald McDonald house. To be honest, I was excited about the project, but just not so excited about the time we had to get there in the morning. Anyone who knows me knows I am everything BUT a morning person.

As the smell of bacon, eggs, and pancakes began to wake the families upstairs, we soon had our first family join us in the dining area. As we began talking with families, we learned each person's unique story of what had brought them to UVA children's hospital and how much they appreciated the Ronald McDonald House being there for them during their time of need.

As each family finished their breakfast, we gave them an Easter basket and invited them to our Easter service. Many were away from their churches this Easter and they graciously thanked our group and some said they'd like to come out. One particular gentleman was so touched and shared that he was there at the hospital with his 17 year old son, who had been a perfectly healty athlete, but suddenly collapsed only for doctors to find that he had a large aneurism on his brain. He was miles away from his home and spending an Easter weekend he had never dreamed he would be spending at a hospital. He was a believer and said that Easter was such a special time for his family and he was having a particularly difficult time this Easter in light of his circumstances.

After sharing his story with Nate, he walked away with tears in his eyes, burdened by the weight of his child's health. I began to think how different Easter this year must be for each of these families. At a time when most families are participating in various Easter activities, watching their children running around the house looking for Easter eggs , dyeing eggs, or telling their children "don't eat another piece of that candy" before your meal; instead, these families are not experiencing the joy of a child's laughter this year. They are many miles from home, sitting by their child's bedside as they fight very serious illnesses, recover from surgeries, or wait to hear "what's next" in their child's medical plan or rehabilitation.  We read story after story and viewed hundreds of children's photos on the "thank you" wall, each a reminder of difficult illnesses, rare diseases, or serious surgeries these children and families have faced over the years. 

Watching these families today reminded me how often we take our health and each day for granted. It was a reminder that life is fragile, we are not promised tomorrow, and what we do each day can count for eternity.  We can choose to make a difference, even if for just one person that may cross our path in the day that we are given. I know our desire was to serve and hopefully touch lives today; yet, as is always the case when we serve someone- WE instead, are always impacted in a much greater way.

Friday, April 6, 2012

Good Friday-- Literally

Today is Good Friday, and for us this year, it is an extra special Good Friday as we just heard that our dossier (a.k.a.- our entire life on paper) arrived at the China Center for Children's Welfare and Adoption (CCCWA-- you will be seeing these initials alot). It was delivered today by our agency's staff, so it's so good to know that all of the paperwork we worked so diligently on, has now made the long journey overseas and is safely at the Center in Beijing. (insert the word relief here)

This makes Good Friday an even more exciting day this year as we not only celebrate this fun news, but we pause on this day to reflect and celebrate what Christ did for us through the cross as we look forward to Sunday, the celebration of His resurrection. For a Christ-follower, this is one of the most important weeks of the year, so we are blessed to have had our dossier be just another special part of this weekend of celebration. We are thankful to each of you who have had a part in praying for our paperwork to go smoothly these last few months.

Now we wait for our next step, which is to hear that our dossier has been "logged in". This means that in the next few weeks, our dossier will receive a date (Log in Date- LID) and this important date is from which everything in the adoption process is based. You will hear us talk about this date often. Dossier paperwork is not immediately reviewed when it arrives in China, so our LID is very important as we will continue to watch as we wait in process, for when our "log in date" has come up and our paperwork has been reviewed and approved by China.  Currently, China has completed the review of all dossiers through the month of September 2011.  Our prayer is that our dossier will have been reviewed before we are called with a child match. If so, it will mean less time we will wait between accepting our child and having to travel; otherwise, if we are matched earlier by our agency and our paperwork in China has not been reviewed, it will take longer between being matched and being approved to travel. ( = worse case scenario)

I hope that as you enter this weekend, that you are able to take time to reflect on what this weekend is all about, and pause to reflect on the greatest sacrifice ever given and and the most amazing miracle of our risen Savior, Jesus Christ.

Monday, April 2, 2012

The big DTC day!

So the email I have been waiting to see for over two weeks finally arrived today-- our dossier is being mailed to China today and everything has been approved! This is known as DTC or "dossier to China" day. Anyone who is adopting or is involved in the adoption process is very familiar with these initials. I must admit I was getting just a little bit frustrated (yes I am human and I'm just being transparent that I, too, have frustrations at times with the nature of the process) that it was taking so long to get our dossier through review/prep at our agency and get it mailed to China. I guess I am just used to how quickly we send them out from our office, so it was just different to have to wait much longer for it to be sent and to hope that everything was correct. 

At least we can go into Easter week knowing that our paperwork just might make it to China before Easter. In light of this, I decided to break into Nate's Easter candy stash (well, the stash he doesn't know I bought for him yet - his Reese's peanut butter "eggs"...) and capture the big day-


I will say it's great to see all of our hours of work finally come to this point and to know in just a few days, our dossier will be arriving in China.  Now let's just pray that the airplane that is carrying our precious cargo has a very good pilot and that everyone who handles our "paper baby" gets it to the right place.